Have you noticed how you can be having a good day—perhaps receiving compliments on a project or a new hairstyle—when someone comes along with criticism or negative remarks? Suddenly, all those good feelings vanish, and you find yourself doubting and questioning, indulging in thoughts like, “Who do I think I am?” or, “I’ll never get this right.”
Why does this happen? The tendency to fixate on the negative isn’t a personal flaw; it’s a survival mechanism rooted in our evolutionary past. Our ancestors needed to be hyper-aware of threats to survive. While this vigilance protected them from physical dangers, in our modern world, it often manifests as unnecessary stress, anxiety, and a skewed perception of reality.
The Power of Neuroplasticity
Our brains are wired with a “negativity bias,” meaning they latch onto negative experiences like Velcro while dismissing positive ones like Teflon. This evolutionary adaptation was essential for survival—responding to threats ensured safety, while pleasant experiences weren’t critical to staying alive. However, this negativity bias can leave us stuck in a cycle of stress and self-doubt in today’s world.
The good news? Our brains are capable of change. This ability, known as neuroplasticity, allows us to rewire our mental patterns by consciously focusing on the positive. By training our brains to notice and absorb positive experiences, we can build confidence, resilience, and a more balanced perspective. This rewiring helps us counterbalance the bad feelings from negative experiences with the good feelings from positive ones.
“Taking in the Good”
Rick Hanson, PhD, has developed a simple yet powerful technique called “Taking in the Good.” It’s a practical application of neuroplasticity, helping us rewire our brains for happiness and resilience. Here’s how it works:
1. Notice Positive Experiences: Look for small joys in your day—a kind interaction, a good cup of coffee, or a refreshing night’s sleep. Train yourself to notice these moments.
2. Savor the Experience: Bring your full attention to the positive feelings. Breathe deeply and let the sensations settle into your body for 10–20 seconds.
3. Let It Soak In: Imagine the experience absorbing into you, like warm sunshine on your skin or the comfort of a soothing cup of tea. This process helps create new neural pathways.
4. Optional Healing Step: Link the positive feelings to a past negative experience by keeping the positive bright in your mind and the negative dim in the background. This can help reframe old wounds. (Note: Avoid this step if it feels triggering.)
This technique is simple, effective, and can be practiced anytime. It’s not about ignoring challenges but about building a mental “savings account” of positivity to draw on during tough times.
Building Resilience Over Time
Consistently practicing “Taking in the Good” helps shift your brain’s default setting from negativity to positivity. This doesn’t mean you’ll never face challenges, but it equips you with a reservoir of strength and joy to navigate them. Over time, you’ll naturally start noticing and savoring the good in your life.
Remember, rewiring your brain is a journey that takes patience and persistence. Be kind to yourself as you practice, and celebrate small victories along the way.
Why not start now? Take a moment to notice something positive around you—a pleasant memory, a small success, or a kind gesture. Breathe it in, savor it, and let it soak into your being. You’re already on your way to creating a stronger, more resilient brain!
